Dear Internet,
I’ve decided to start this blog as a way to help myself heal from the wounds I have inflicted upon myself over the years. I have an unhealthy relationship with food and I hope that my blogging about my journey, I can overcome this. For some reason putting all of this out into the world seems like it will make me more accountable than if I just wrote it in a notebook for no one to ever see.
I have tried to lose weight many, many times. I’ve been successful, but it seems I have been more successful in putting the pounds back on. In retrospect, I was doing it for all the wrong reasons. I know simply losing weight will not make me happy. It didn’t before, and I gained it all back (plus some) because I just wanted to look “hot.” So here I am, all 242.5 pounds of me. This time, I want to be healthy. I need to be healthy. I no longer want to duck into the bathroom to hide while I catch my breath after walking up a slight incline on my way to class. I want to hike up mountains, run on the beach, laugh until I cry, and really live.
From here on out, I’m going to live like I mean it.
Love,
Ashley
The Only Way Up is Down 